Who I am.

I like going on walks ... I like holding hands. I like going to the beach, no matter what time it is. I like looking at the stars and I love hiking. Camping is something I enjoy. I love falling asleep in the arms of someone who loves me ... I like being kissed on the forehead and having my back rubbed. I love massages no matter who they're from. If you give me one, I will melt. Guaranteed. I love taking pictures. I love laughing, I love being silly, and I love when people aren't afraid to be silly sometimes. I like cartoons. I love to swim and play in the water and I love board games. I like to sing when I am alone, even though I'm not very good at it. But if you ask me to sing for you, I probably won't. It has to be spontaneous. Music is important to me and I will not tolerate music that is degrading or crude in any way. I love snail mail ... I love cards. I love getting mail, but I like sending it even more. 

Generally speaking, I think before I speak -- especially in large groups. But once you get to know me, I am an open book. Don't be put off by my apparent shyness ... because shy is the last thing to describe me accurately. I love when people open doors for me and pull out my chair for me. I want to be respected -- I want my feelings and my thoughts to be respected. I'm not always as confident as I seem. I love being held. Always. Sometimes I don't want to talk about what is bothering me ... sometimes I just want a hug ... someone who will let me cry. I like when people aren't afraid to show what they're really feeling. I don't like when people run from their true feelings because it doesn't do anyone any good. 

I do not like being told things just to make me happy. I would rather be told the truth and be hurt than be "protected" and happy. I overreact sometimes. Don't be afraid to tell me I'm wrong or out of line. I might not be happy about it at first but I will come to realization soon. I like people who are strong enough to face me when I'm raging ... people who will let me be angry for a little while. When I'm hurt, I withdraw. I threaten to run away from the situation that is causing me pain. All I want is to be told honestly that I'm loved. 

I love paper and journals. I love the smell of new books and leather.  I love sweatpants ... I love having my hair in a messy bun. I love being comfortable and I love being told that I'm beautiful, even if I'm in sweats and my hair is a mess. I am just as comfortable in a skirt as I am in sweats. I like to work, it makes me feel productive and useful. It keeps me from being idle. I dislike feeling useless. Though I absolutely love being able to do nothing when I want to. I love staying up late and I love sleeping though I do not think I will never sleep enough. I love to paint, even if it is a replica of some sort. If it turns out good I am very proud. 

I love reading for hours on end ... especially outside on a breezy and sunny day. I love the sun ... I love being at the perfect temperature, not hot and sweaty. I especially love playing in the rain and sitting outside when it's stormy. I really love making snowmen and snow angels and skiing and just plain being in the snow. 

I can't wait to teach my kids the way my parents taught me. 

I love the fact that I will one day have kids and MY parents will be the grandparents - the Pake and Beppe. I can only dream of the day I can turn them to grandparents. How proud and happy they will be. All the things they will help teach my kids. How much they will spoil them. 

I can’t wait to step out onto the isle of my wedding and see my future husband up there standing and waiting to turn around and see me. I can’t wait to see his face. I can’t wait to have my daddy here on earth walk me to the beginning of my new life with the man I have found and God leading us to wherever he wants us to be. 

I love riding horses. If anything I regret in life is when I stopped showing and riding. But it’s something I chose and I wish I hadn’t but I am glad that I can still saddle up and enjoy myself whenever I am home. I can’t wait to hopefully live somewhere I can have my horse in my backyard and be able to just go out and watch her graze. Get on her and my husband on another and just take an afternoon stroll. 

I cannot wait to bring my kids up the way I was, out in the country and free spirited. Able to do just about whatever I imagined with all the space and my imaginations ran wild.  Smelling the flowers, playing in the dirt till the sun goes down, sitting in the pool till the later hours of the night arguing about what to make for dinner once we would get around to it. Sleeping out in a tent in the backyard but going in the house in the middle of the night because of the sprinklers coming on or because it is to hot - okay and maybe for when it got to scary. 

I love to travel. In a plane more than anything. I want to go everywhere I can get to in my life. I hope that God has that in His plan for my life. Whether it is somewhere here in the states or off into a random timbuktu country not many people have been to. And whether it is for pleasure or for work either will do to please me. Just put me on a plane and let it fly. 

I am a small piece of treasure. We all are. And I am treasured by God and by my Family. I think my family tries their hardest to be the best family they can be and there is nothing I can do but be thankful for them and what they do. I don't think they know how much I miss them when I am away at college, but I do. I just can hope everything is going as well as it seems to be. 

Joy. Peace. Love. Happiness.