Simply Obsessed with at the moment!

Seriously, I am not sure what is wrong…well mainly because nothing is wrong haha but here are just a few thing that I am obsessed with and/or really want! haha

This little guy/girl is something I have wanted for so long!

But I still can’t decided if I am going to be able to handle such a small dog after having big dogs my whole life! ;D

<——————————————

This is plain and simple.

Looks like peace and happiness.

Shouldn’t our lives be like that?

————————->

Okay this one…you have to look closely…yes there is a huge garden of flowers and LOTS of tulips ;D But do you notice it is in the middle of a bunch of big trees in a forest? How amazing would that be? To just go randomly and plant a bunch or amazing flowers…and then go back in a month or so and see this!?!?

Plan anyone?

Now this…

Literally my dream for a wedding in a picture.

So just beautiful and rugged.

——————————–>

Most importantly my friends.

Family. And most importantly my Church Family.

<——————————

and last but not least…

I, along with my roommate Christian,

are head over heals for wedding blogs!

It is something that just makes us smile to see the love between two people captured in such a unique and unforgettable way.

Peace & Love

My Princess...Hear My Voice

So there is this book I have is so incredible and so breath taking at times that I honestly don’t know what to do with it other than saying “Thank You God!” It opens my eyes to things I always wanted to hear yet never knew where to find it in the bible and then one day in my daily devotional it is right there in front of me. Something I need to hear but also something  I want to hear.

For the past three weeks I have been battling with what I want to do major wise while I am here at APU. For some odd reason – which I will say is completely a God reason, my mind has been on Psychology and wondering if that is something that I in fact will have the passion I do for Nursing. It has scared me beyond my mind as I have told some of my friends about the possible change – and tell them “I am so nervous but honestly, I have this unbelievable amount of peace!” As my roommate Amy is now in the APU nursing program, she just started her rotation through the hospital and came home last week twice just gushing about all she had done. Most don’t understand but because I have been wanting to be a nurse for SO long, hearing anything she was doing, even when she was in class still learning about the beginnings of hospital work, I got so jealous. All semester so far I have had to struggle with it, though now as I am writing this I honestly have nothing better to say than I am so happy for her to be finally doing something she absolutely loves and that I am completely okay with it and that jealously factor in my life has gone. Yes I still want to be a nurse, I don’t think that part of me will ever actually leave me. But at this point I think all I need to do is what God wants me to do.

As I prepare myself to make that walk over to the Undergrad Registrars office I felt that I in a way needed to prepare for this big change happening in my life. So I sat and opened this little book I talked about earlier “His Princess, Love Letters from Your King,” and of course since last week was such a tough week I put this book away in need of having to focus on school work. Personally that kills me to say that and admit to myself and to God that yeah I put you behind material things in my life. But God has an interesting way of working – - when I do happen to skip a day or two…or three, when I do pick it up again it seems to be that the spot I left off is what I need to hear the most at that moment. That if I would have read it on the correct day without skipping, it might not have made that big of an impact on me. So today I open it up and it reads as follows….

My Princess, Hear my voice,

I am always here for you. I’m never too busy to talk to you, My beloved. If you will turn off the things

around you that drown out My voice, you will begin to hear Me in your spirit.  When you don’t know where

to go, you will hear Me give you divine direction. When you are in need of a friend, you wil hear Me whipser,

“I am here.”

When you need comfort, you will hear Me call to you,

“Come to Me.“

Don’t let the voice of your own uncertanties distract you from My still, small voice. Quiet your

spirit, and know that I am your Heavenly father and you are My precious daughter – and I love

when you listen to me.”

-Love, Your King and the Voice of heaven

Honestly I can’t grasp God sometimes – only because it is so outrageous how he works. But I honestly love it more than anything right now. He has honestly been my solid rock in the past couple weeks, even if I did sway away from Him for a couple days. I honestly believe it is because He does know my heart and He knew I was yearning for Him, even though my body and mind couldn’t make the time for Him. I think He really means it when He says, ‘I know your heart.’ (sorry I can’t come up with the reference =[ ).

Then I went ahead and the verse that Pastor Don mentioned for just a bit in church yesterday and I for some reason wrote it down. WHOAH. Philippians 3:12-4:1 – The title of that section in my bible is ‘Pressing on Toward the Goal.’ The part I loved the most in it was verse 13-14,

“Brothers, I do not consider myself yet to have taken hold of it. But one thing I do: Forgetting what is behind and straining toward what is ahead, I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God had called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”

With changing my major the thought of having just in a way ‘tossed thousands of dollars out the window,’ frightens me and I just can’t believe it. And having not passed two classes for a major I was supposedly in LOVE with…all those things attack me as things I need to do over so I can say I got through it, or things I freak out wondering…”why couldn’t this have happened sooner so I didn’t have to ‘waste’ money??” It is all so incredibly tough, but like my college youth pastor Allen told me at lunch one day (for as much as I remember it being), “Why does any of that matter if God did something great for your life. If your relationship with Him grew closer and you now know what you want to do? God will always provide the money if you follow what he wants you to do.”

There is always a way with God. Always.

All I seem to think about lately

This place. The place I will be for almost three entire months this summer. 85 days. In the Dominican Republic – - and I literally have NOT been able to get this upcoming journey out of my head. My roomies going to Ghana, Tanzania, and working up at Hume Lake,  simply means that we will all be gone this summer in different parts of the world all doing work for God. It is insane to me to think that this is what we will be doing this summer, all separate from each other yet each intertwined because there is only the one goal in mind. It isn’t money, it isn’t being away, it is just to follow what God wants us to do for him. I am so overly excited for all four of us.

Simply Peace & Love.

Like branches of a tree we grow in different directions, yet our roots remain as one. Each of our lives will always be a special part of the other’s.

There's always a first...

First date. First kiss. First time trying sushi. First time at the beach. First time out of the country. First time on a plane. First time skyping. First time going to the gym. First time starting a blog. There literally is a first time for just about anything and this time it’s my own blog! As I am super excited though curious about what it will turn out to be, I can only hope for the best on this journey of online blogging. What I originally thought this was going to be about is about my trip to the Dominican Republic…which is still a mere 86 days away…and to let everyone back home know what I was up to in my three month adventure. And yes I know it hasn’t started yet, but I feel like God has been doing so many different things in my life pulling me closer to him so that he is able to better mold me into the person he wants me to be going on this trip 100% for him. He honestly has complete control of it in my life right now and is very close to having my entire life in his hands. I dislike saying that he doesn’t have my whole life in his hands, but that he only has certain parts that I am willing to let him take over and lead me in. Whereas with other areas I feel that I am still fully capable of doing things myself. Which I am slowly but surely learning is definitely not the right way because what I want and do turns out to somehow always be the ‘not so right’ thing to do.

Following God’s word has been an intriguing thing for me to do but yet I still have this incredible yearning for God to be in my life and for me to do whatever the heck he wants me to do. The chapels for the week were all supposed to be about rest and how it seems impossible to get as a college student. Which in reality it basically is haha but about two Sundays ago I was sitting in church with my roomies and our college youth pastors’ wife sat in front of us and was asking how our weekend had been. We being the college students we are replied with the usual, ‘studying and hanging out, yea know…’ She responded with ‘Did you get any rest this weekend?’ And I am pretty sure we looked pretty dumbfounded and our faces looking like ‘you’re kidding right?’ So I proceeded to ask how her weekend had went and if her and Allen had done anything fun or whatnot…she responded with “Yeah it was very good yesterday 2 o’clock rolled around and Allen and I decided to rest for the rest of the day.” Then sadly church started so she turned around to pay attention but for some reason that phrase stuck with me. Now I can’t tell you that is exactly what she said since she was a little cut off, but hearing that just made me smile. Around my house as a kid and all growing up we were up by 9 at the latest on Saturdays and either outside doing yard work or inside cleaning the house — both heavily dreaded each weekend, an the word rest was only used if our parents decided they wanted a nap for an hour or so. But what Janelle had said to me just made me smile and think ‘Wow, I hope my husband and I can one day do that for each other and for our family.’ Just be able to do some work and then just relax or rest either with God or with each other or maybe even alone. Whether that means going and waking around somewhere or driving around to the mountains or beach, just laying on the couch, or actually sleeping, I earnestly want to make rest a part of my life now in college and for the rest of my life.

So finally, I have been reading a small little book called “His Princess: Love Letters from Your King,” and literally have been baffled and speechless every time that I read it. Like I said earlier, I feel like I have been yearning for God just to mold me and take hold of my life but yet it is so hard to let go and give it all to him…Trust is usually what it is called. And being able to rest whether literally or just in God to find that rejuvenating power from him. I come across this excerpt from the book and it simply says this 

“My Princess, Run to win.

You, My pricess, are destined to win. I know how tired you often become,

just by trying to do and say all the right things. Take the pressure off yourself,

because I did not put it there. The world may judge you by what they see and hear,

but I look within your heart, My child. I see your desire to please Me, and I see your

struggle to please others. If you want to win this endurance race, you must

let go of your need for approval of others and seek

My will and My pleasure.

Simplify your life, and let go of the burdens that weigh you down. You’ll find that My

grace will lighten your step, and My favor will even draw others to join you.

Yes, at times you will stumbles and fall. But don’t worry, I’m here to help you get back up

again – as often as it takes. Make it your daily passion to run withMe, and I will

carry you over the finish line of your faith. Together we will win!”

Love, Your King and Your Champion

Honestly don’t know how to put it other than God knew exactly what I needed to hear and put it there for me to remember and to realize. And since they are written in the form of a letter — I am a person who is ALL about letters whether writing handwritten or emails — I understand things better and can feel the heart and the passion and realness of the person sending it to me. In this case it is straight from God and all I can do is praise him and understand that he truly wants the best for me and is always here. 48/14 (that’s like twice as much ;P).

Much love and rest.