First date. First kiss. First time trying sushi. First time at the beach. First time out of the country. First time on a plane. First time skyping. First time going to the gym. First time starting a blog. There literally is a first time for just about anything and this time it’s my own blog! As I am super excited though curious about what it will turn out to be, I can only hope for the best on this journey of online blogging. What I originally thought this was going to be about is about my trip to the Dominican Republic…which is still a mere 86 days away…and to let everyone back home know what I was up to in my three month adventure. And yes I know it hasn’t started yet, but I feel like God has been doing so many different things in my life pulling me closer to him so that he is able to better mold me into the person he wants me to be going on this trip 100% for him. He honestly has complete control of it in my life right now and is very close to having my entire life in his hands. I dislike saying that he doesn’t have my whole life in his hands, but that he only has certain parts that I am willing to let him take over and lead me in. Whereas with other areas I feel that I am still fully capable of doing things myself. Which I am slowly but surely learning is definitely not the right way because what I want and do turns out to somehow always be the ‘not so right’ thing to do.
Following God’s word has been an intriguing thing for me to do but yet I still have this incredible yearning for God to be in my life and for me to do whatever the heck he wants me to do. The chapels for the week were all supposed to be about rest and how it seems impossible to get as a college student. Which in reality it basically is haha but about two Sundays ago I was sitting in church with my roomies and our college youth pastors’ wife sat in front of us and was asking how our weekend had been. We being the college students we are replied with the usual, ‘studying and hanging out, yea know…’ She responded with ‘Did you get any rest this weekend?’ And I am pretty sure we looked pretty dumbfounded and our faces looking like ‘you’re kidding right?’ So I proceeded to ask how her weekend had went and if her and Allen had done anything fun or whatnot…she responded with “Yeah it was very good yesterday 2 o’clock rolled around and Allen and I decided to rest for the rest of the day.” Then sadly church started so she turned around to pay attention but for some reason that phrase stuck with me. Now I can’t tell you that is exactly what she said since she was a little cut off, but hearing that just made me smile. Around my house as a kid and all growing up we were up by 9 at the latest on Saturdays and either outside doing yard work or inside cleaning the house — both heavily dreaded each weekend, an the word rest was only used if our parents decided they wanted a nap for an hour or so. But what Janelle had said to me just made me smile and think ‘Wow, I hope my husband and I can one day do that for each other and for our family.’ Just be able to do some work and then just relax or rest either with God or with each other or maybe even alone. Whether that means going and waking around somewhere or driving around to the mountains or beach, just laying on the couch, or actually sleeping, I earnestly want to make rest a part of my life now in college and for the rest of my life.
So finally, I have been reading a small little book called “His Princess: Love Letters from Your King,” and literally have been baffled and speechless every time that I read it. Like I said earlier, I feel like I have been yearning for God just to mold me and take hold of my life but yet it is so hard to let go and give it all to him…Trust is usually what it is called. And being able to rest whether literally or just in God to find that rejuvenating power from him. I come across this excerpt from the book and it simply says this 
“My Princess, Run to win.
You, My pricess, are destined to win. I know how tired you often become,
just by trying to do and say all the right things. Take the pressure off yourself,
because I did not put it there. The world may judge you by what they see and hear,
but I look within your heart, My child. I see your desire to please Me, and I see your
struggle to please others. If you want to win this endurance race, you must
let go of your need for approval of others and seek
My will and My pleasure.
Simplify your life, and let go of the burdens that weigh you down. You’ll find that My
grace will lighten your step, and My favor will even draw others to join you.
Yes, at times you will stumbles and fall. But don’t worry, I’m here to help you get back up
again – as often as it takes. Make it your daily passion to run withMe, and I will
carry you over the finish line of your faith. Together we will win!”
Love, Your King and Your Champion
Honestly don’t know how to put it other than God knew exactly what I needed to hear and put it there for me to remember and to realize. And since they are written in the form of a letter — I am a person who is ALL about letters whether writing handwritten or emails — I understand things better and can feel the heart and the passion and realness of the person sending it to me. In this case it is straight from God and all I can do is praise him and understand that he truly wants the best for me and is always here. 48/14 (that’s like twice as much ;P).
Much love and rest.
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